How To Help a Partner Squirt


How To Help a Partner Squirt

By Patient Polyamorist

Female ejaculation is a controversial topic. Some people deny that women can ejaculate at all while others claim that those who squirt are just peeing. Those of us who have been privileged to be with someone who does ejaculate know better.

Most women can squirt, even if most women haven’t yet. This article is to help you and your partner figure out how.

How can we get ready?

Foreplay can start early in the day – plan ahead and maximize sexual energy. Most women squirt more when they’re more turned on. Whether its psychological games, oral sex, spankings, or massage, be sure to take the time to push all her buttons.

Go to the bathroom just before playing. Stimulation of the urethra will cause a person to feel the need to pee. If she clenches up she won’t squirt much, and if she pushes too much she could accidentally poop a little. Going to the bathroom first helps both.

If she pees first and remembers not to squeeze too much, she will gush. Have towels ready if you don’t have a plastic sheet or a product designed to keep your mattress safe. Though ejaculate doesn’t usually smell or stain, it can leave a big wet spot.

What do I need to know?

Squirters need to feel comfortable in their bodies. If you’re the non-squirting partner, you will want to show your enthusiasm about her (and about squirting) frequently.

It can be difficult for a woman to achieve a squiring orgasm if she’s uncomfortable with her partner or in general. Relaxing her muscles is essential to allow you to stimulate the G-spot sufficiently freely for her to have a squirting orgasm.

Most women require rapid and intense manipulation of their g-spot in order to squirt. Remember her vagina is adapted for giving birth – it’s very difficult to break a pussy.

The better hydrated the squirter is, the more she will ejaculate and the better it will feel for her. As the urethral sponge fills with fluid, it can grow to be the size of a shell-on walnut and extend past her public bone toward the exterior of her body.

Familiarize yourself with the perineum, the elastic wall of the vagina closest to the anus. When she clenches the muscles around her vagina, the wall becomes taut, but when she relaxes (or pushes), it  has well more than an inch of stretch.

Find her urethral sponge (G-spot). The most common mistake is to search too deep inside. It is on roof of the vagina, on the side closest to her belly button, about one inch inside the vaginal opening. It has a wrinkled texture, like dish-pan hands.

The “g-spot orgasm” that accompanies an ejaculation is different from a clitoral orgasm. The better hydrated and more comfortable she is, the better it will feel for her. Once they know how, some women can ejaculate from clitoral stimulation alone.

What do I do to help my partner squirt?

It is true that everyone is different, and as always, you should pay attention to your partner in case they’re giving you feedback. That said, this is one of the more universally applicable sexual techniques I have learned.

Use your shoulder and chest muscles to do the work, not your forearms. This increases your strength and stamina. Give yourself leverage by straddling her torso or sitting/kneeling alongside her north of her hips. Don’t sit between her legs.

After she is ready to go, put the ring and middle finger of your dominant hand inside her, with the pads of facing her clit. Bend your fingers to form an “L” at the knuckle closest to your hand, pressing down on her perineum with the short side of the “L”.

Your fingertips will feel her G-spot. Alternatively squeeze this spot into her pubic bone using the top one-third of your fingers and stretch the opposite wall using the short section of the “L” you made.

During your “down stroke,” push down toward her anus about one inch. During your up stroke, simultaneously pull your fingers towards the outside of her body with a come here gesture.

This stimulation needs to be rapidly alternated at a rate between 90 and 120 beats a minute. You will begin to hear a distinctive squishing sound coupled with a vacuum sucking sound – this is your hint that you’re doing it right. Her g-spot will swell.

As she gets close to orgasm, she may start to clench on your fingers with her vagina. If she does this, remind her to relax or even push. She may complain of a sensation of needing to pee – you may need to remind her that she just peed minutes ago.

If she was turned on and hydrated when you started, and can relax and let go, she should gush  1-6 ounces of fluid with continued stimulation of 3-5 minutes. She should be able to squirt again just minutes later.


  1. brownqueen24 says:

    I find this hard to believe I am a 23 year old sexually active women and I don’t think I’ve ever had an orgasm from sex. What do I need to do? What am I missing?

  2. bubba29 says:

    are there any instructions for what the woman should be doing while her partner is stimulating her in this way? is there more to it than just laying back and enjoying the ride?

  3. […] have articles on breast play, fingering / squirting, handjobs, oral, vaginal sex, anal sex, anal toys, and a variety of other topics, so if […]

  4. […] you know her g-spot well now, after our fingering article as well as the one on squirting. So try to angle your penis towards her g-spot in any position you’re in. Rear entry positions […]

  5. Cole Matuschka says:

    When a past girlfriend and I tried it with the two finger “jackhammer” effect and she released for the first time and even though it totally rocked her she said she felt ashamed that she had made a mess! After a little positive reaffirmation she was able to enjoy the enhanced sensitivity and was able to come around 5-6 times in a period of about 7 minutes! Made me feel great and she loved it! :)

  6. […] recent article on how to help your partner squirt made quite a splash, which was no surprise as controversies have […]

  7. […] advice on how to make your girl squirt (and some more advanced fingering techniques), check out this article by Patient […]

  8. […] got used to it quickly. My primary sex partner is adept at bringing on G-spot orgasms but loves to use this toy to help him out. It has the right curve so that when you slide it into […]

  9. […] to know her G-spot. Do you know where her G-spot is, and how a G-spot works? It’s located one to three inches inside her vagina, directly behind […]

  10. […] located approximately two inches inside the vagina on the tummy side. When a woman is turned on, it fills with fluid, getting to be the the size of […]

  11. dogsheep says:

    Most women can squirt… citation needed.

    • Patient Polyamorist says:

      First hand, personal experience. Since I started practicing polyamory about two and a half years ago, I’ve had 68 female partners of varying seriousness – long term committed relationships, short term dating that didn’t work out, play partners at orgies, in swinging situations. Only four of these women didn’t squirt for me, for reasons enumerated in the article.

  12. penelope says:

    Nice instructions, but no suitable for all women. I tried a lot: never got it

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